Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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