if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize