dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
