For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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