WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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