i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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