Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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