it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize