So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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