nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
