Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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