He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
