I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize