What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize