apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
