If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.