Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Just fell off a train. Bad.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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