Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
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She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
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She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime