what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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