Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
