She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm getting married
To pizza
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
