She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
