I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
