The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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