ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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