plz talk dirty to me
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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