I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
