This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I have post one night stand depression
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
