She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize