Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
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