hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize