then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
