We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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