did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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