who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize