benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
