Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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