Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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