I woke up to her vacumming the grass
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
