Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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