Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize