If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
