I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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