Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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