i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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