That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
My vagina just recognized that song.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
