I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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