No awkward lesbian experiences without me
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
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