I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
