He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
