Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
